NOT TALKING

Christine and I haven’t spoken in almost a week. Time since we argued feels stretched. I don’t fill it as I usually do. Although I keep to my routine of work and such I don’t read and I try but cannot listen to music.

Christine is above in our bedroom. I am alert to her every movement, each and every footfall, every creak and thud.

The telephone rings and I am startled but realise I have spoken hardly at all since we stopped shouting and that here, in the house, I haven’t uttered a single word. But still I sit stiffly and wait and when I hear Christine pushing up from the bed I am relieved. I listen to her voice through the ceiling, one side of a conversation, low and abstracted.

A little later I will relinquish this room and take my turn up there. I will lay on the dishevelled bed. I am exhausted but won’t sleep. For hours I will stare up at the ceiling and at some point I will undress and crawl beneath the covers. Eventually Christine will join me and, facing away from each other, we will adopt almost identical foetal like positions and try not to move, try not to touch.

 

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5 comments

  1. sanberdooboy

    was in this situation a number of times in a previous life. your piece reminds me of how silence can suffocate, as if it wraps around the throat. the last sentence with the repeated “try not,” provides a strong, haunting closure.

    • markrenney2

      It’s really good to hear that you feel this piece works. I’ve actually been working on re-edit and intend to post it on HA. Thank you. A much appreciated comment. Regards Mark.

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