OLD SOUL

THE STAND DOWN ROUTINES

image by christine renney

When I was a kid, they said I had a good head on my shoulders and I was an old soul. I didn’t push and force them to explain – I knew what they meant. That I was sensible and not impulsive and could be trusted. It was a compliment and I couldn’t help feeling a bit smug.

But they also said I had an old head on young shoulders and this I didn’t like so much. It made me want to rebel, to stop acting so sensibly and to be impulsive but of course I didn’t because they were right.

I was six, maybe seven years old, and I couldn’t help but visualise it – my body with a different head, a bigger and older head.  It was scary and I had nightmares. I remember waking up in the middle of the night and clutching my face, unsure…

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